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The problem was that like-called-love can really only take you so far, but further than you ever wanted to go. . .

Part 2

 
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Curiosity, at this point in my life, was inextricably linked to panic. The small moments of silence that allowed me to consider ending the relationship were attached to the panic of disappointing EVERYONE. And right under that panic, there was the even more terrifying

I get it andI am you.

I know that space like a muscle memory. One step further is too far to carry what you hold. But, exhale. There are spaces to lay down these burdens where they are safe and honored. This is a pause, to look around to see if there can be a different relationship with your life. There is love in this space because it allows us to go within ourselves.

prospect that I would have to take responsibility for my own life. I did not spend a lot of time in the space of curiosity until much later  But it turns out that without curiosity it is impossible to expand on your experience of life. If you only look at yourself, your life, your relationships, and your experiences the way you always have, you can only see them in that way. Curiosity allows us to entertain the idea that there could be another way to see ourselves, in the middle of those stories we create. With curiosity, I could question whether or not I had to stay stuck
in those old roles of victim, justifier, and manipulator.

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Are you willing to look?

Where does it live in my body?

How wide is it?

Is it familiar?

What color is it?

Can I move it?

Does it look like something I've seen before?

What if you could see all of you?

Who am I when I'm not trying to be?

Is this working for you?

Has it always been this way?

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